Not all chronic illnesses can be cured completely. Some can be life-threatening with no definite time, such as heart attack and stroke. Chronic illnesses, such as diabetes, last over time and ask for more intensive supervision. However, not all chronic illnesses persist all throughout one’s life, and not all of them cause death, though they can really be a challenge to both parties – the person infected and the people in his/her life. In my own experience, I’ve faced a number of deeply-concerned family members and a few friends who insist on helping a patient to survive the process. Most specifically, husbands and wives.
I remember not a long time ago, I encountered a man who recently found out that he has cancer. I wasn’t surprised by his visit, but I rarely get patients who seek for advice. He shared some insights and admitted his troubles. He was brave in a way, but as far as I can see, he is more concerned about his wife and their marriage than his illness. In a patient’s mind, the illness isn’t real until it comes to attack. Even during our conversation, he still could not believe the news. He told me that he’s scared as hell, but he fears for his wife even more. He’s been expecting that his mood would be unstable and that his attitude on the usual dealings would change. He expects that he won’t be the same man that he is now once his illness swallow all his strength. He’s afraid that others around him would treat him differently, and that these people take his wife away.
I then told him important factors he and his wife should consider as they face together this illness. I’ve listed some important things that could help them:
- Communication – Communication is important in any kind of relationship. A chronic illness is already difficult and it won’t be helpful to invite a misunderstanding in. Also, communication is a two-way process. Both parties should have their turns to speak their minds. It also acceptance and understanding must be achieved thru listening.
- Emotions – Control your emotions. It is okay to express yourself and let fear or anger out when situations get tough, but don’t forget that emotions should never be dominant. Keep in mind that you and your partner are in a battle against the illness. It’s not you and your emotions alone.
- Address Financial Strain – Both partners are responsible in establishing financial stability. Even when one is living with an illness, s/he is still expected to take part. Financial strains should be discussed by partner
- Social Connections – This factor will change in time. Most patients with a chronic illness create a distance from other people – there comes the problem. As partners, you and your beloved should know how face these people, especially your friends and family.
I remembered that this brave person got emotional, but immediately put a smile on his face. That time, I wasn’t just a stranger who claimed to know what he’s been going through. That moment, I was a friend, sharing his own interests and stories. He also came as a friend and told me that prior to our meeting, he came across a Fenugreek Testosterone. He insisted that I should buy it and see the benefits of fenugreek testosterone. We then ended our conversation with an exchange of smiles. I told him to see me next month and to bring his wife with him.